Gentlemanly Manners vs. Equality

Several months’ ago, I met three mothers for lunch. They each have a son and daughter. I only have a son in elementary school.

We are all different, yet the same. One mother asked me how my son was doing. I said he was doing well. I related a story whereby my son came home after school to tell me that he had “Library Day”. He was interested in a certain book; however, a female classmate kept picking up the same book and checking it out. My son told me that she had already read that book ten times, but wanted to get it again. I told the other three mothers what I told my son: “I don’t care if she has read that book 100 times. If she wants that book, let her have it. If that book means so much to you, we will get the book at another store tomorrow.”

Oddly, the mothers pounced on me. “Oh, no. If your son wants that book, he should get it. Equality reigns.” I defended my position: “No, being a gentleman trumps equality.” I rather felt that these women were teaching their sons and daughters to look out only for themselves.

After all, we hear on the news how atrociously young men treat young women today by plying them with alcohol and then taking them back to dorm rooms or parties so drunk the young women don’t remember anything. We hear on the news how bad mannered and crude we have become as a society.

Is it wrong to raise a young boy to become a man of good, courteous conduct? Is it wrong to raise my son to know “girls goes first”? Is this considered “war on women” for treating girls better? Won’t my son make a good husband one day if he knows how to respectfully and properly treat a woman?